Laughter is good for the body, mind and soul, so have a laugh on me!
A cheerful heart is good medicine but a crushed spirit dries up the bones. Proverbs 17.22
Where the Hell is the remote?
A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp.
They rub it and a Genie comes out.. The Genie says, ‘I ‘ll give each of you just one wish.
”Me first! Me first! ‘ says the admin clerk. ‘I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world. ‘ Puff! She ‘s gone..
‘Me next! Me next! ‘ says the sales rep. ‘I want to be in Hawaii, relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and the love of my life.’ Puff! He ‘s gone.
‘OK, you ‘re up,’ the Genie says to the manager. The manager says, ‘I want those two back in the office after lunch.’
Moral of the story: if your boss is an idiot, let them go first.
My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well. I was amazed – I never knew they worked!
|The day that Albert Einstein feared may have finally arrived:
If you’ve ever worked for a boss who reacts before getting the facts and thinking things through, you will recognize this.
Magnum Steel, feeling it was time for a shakeup, hired a new CEO. The new boss was determined to rid the company of all slackers.
On a tour of the facilities, the CEO noticed a guy leaning against a wall. The room was full of workers and he wanted to let them know that he meant business. He asked the guy, “How much money do you make a week?” A little surprised, the young man looked at him and said, “I make $400 a week. Pourquoi?
“The CEO said, “Wait right here.” He walked back to his office, came back in two minutes, and handed the guy $1,600 in cash and said, “Here’s four weeks’ pay. Now GET OUT and don’t come back! “Feeling pretty good about himself, the CEO looked around the room and asked, “Does anyone want to tell me what that goof-ball did here?”
From across the room a voice said, “He’s the pizza delivery guy from Domino’s.”
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Cell Phone Etiquette –
After a tiring day, a commuter settled down in her seat and closed her eyes.
As the train rolled out of the station, the guy sitting next to her pulled out his cell phone and started talking in a loud voice: “Hi sweetheart. It’s Eric. I’m on the train. Yes, I know, it’s the six thirty and not the four thirty, but I had a long meeting. No, honey, not with that blonde from the accounts office. With the boss. No sweetheart, you’re the only one in my life. Yes, I’m sure, cross my heart.”
Fifteen minutes later, he was still talking loudly, when the young woman sitting next to him had enough and leaned over and said into the phone, “Eric, turn that phone off and come back to bed.” Eric doesn’t talk on his cell phone in public anymore.